26 July, 2008. Sznorkl, Hungary. Officials at the Hungarian Institute of Advanced Enumeration revealed today that a new digit has been discovered. Director of the Institute Prof. Edvard Glomjardocz and expeditionary mathematician Stanislas Malu announced that the new digit would be named “számjegy” and would remain where it was found, between digits 7 and 8.  A Roman character representing the new digit has not been decided upon as of this date.

“The impact of this discovery is only just beginning to dawn on the science and mathematics community” Dr. Malu said. “Of course, many tools in our daily world will have to change. We’ll need to devise new keypads for cell phones, calculators, and computers. Rulers and speedometers for our automobiles will have to be modified as well” Malu said.  “We’re going to have to recalculate pi in base 11. This will keep us busy for a while,” he added with an impish grin. 

“Counting with our fingers will no longer work,” Malu cautioned, “but mathematicians have never liked that habit anyway.”

The news was not uniformly welcomed, however. Wolf Farkas, President of Bandwidth at Intel was troubled by the development. “As of this time we are not sure of what this means for our binary and hexadecimal logic operations. If we have to retool, this will get very expensive. Investors are going to take it in the shorts,” Farkas warned. “We’ll have to see how this plays out.”

Stock prices jumped at the news, however. Those with the most to gain from this discovery are manufacturers of tape measures, calculators , and computer keyboards. Both Wal-Mart and Home Depot stocks jumped 6 % in anticipation of upcoming rush to upgrade. Landfill operators and trash haulers expressed concern, though. Lars Erickson, Director of Plastic Waste at Rubbish Management Systems said “Somebody is going to have to pick all of those little calculators out of the trash.”