Well, shoot. Some Texicans are spoutin’ off about secession again. I’m kinda s’prised it took this long fer their sentiments to get voiced out in the open. Havin’ lived there fer a few years, I could see it comin’ a while back.

So let’s see. Before they split, we’ll set up a US Hong Kong-type city state in Houston so’s we git the port a’ Houston with its petrochemical complex and NASA. Then we’ll make sure we keep the military bases in San Antonio, sorta like Gitmo, and move the Pantex nuclear weapons reservation from the panhandle to the north. After that, we’ll slap a duty on their exports, divert the Rio Grande into Arizona for irrigation, make Galveston Island a US naval station, and claim the oil reserves in the gulf. They can have their West Texas crude.

It’s like a whole nother Central American country!